When couples don’t resolve issues, when one or both of them have the conflict avoidant style, they are more likely to grow distant from each other as they each feel frustrated, hurt and disappointed. While fighting is usually not good, NEVER talking things through and resolving differences is also unhealthy for relationships. Bill was really frustrated because he thought that they were never able to get through any discussions and reach decisions. Any time that Bill raised his voice, or she thought he raised his voice, she would cry and become very upset. Heaven forbid that she would ever want to talk about their relationship!Įllen grew up in a home where there was a lot of fighting. Whenever she disagreed with him, he would run away from conversations. Sandy felt like she could never get Jim to sit down and talk through a problem with her. Many people have problems with conflict and will avoid disagreements at all costs. We understand that diving into disputes can be daunting, but with the right strategies, it’s possible to transform these moments into opportunities for strengthening relationships and fostering deeper understanding. Our goal is to help you navigate through the turbulent waters of conflict with greater ease, enabling you to engage in meaningful dialogues that lead to resolution and growth. By doing so, we aim to provide you with the necessary tools to manage these impulses effectively. The purpose of this discussion is not to criticize this instinct but to acknowledge and understand it. This reaction is not only common but also deeply human, reflecting a natural desire to protect ourselves from emotional distress. Many of us experience a strong aversion to conflict, preferring to avoid it at all costs rather than face the discomfort head-on. Have you ever felt a powerful urge to leave the room the moment a disagreement begins to heat up? If the thought of confrontation makes you want to find the nearest exit, know that you are far from alone. Sally Connolly, LCSW, LMFT has been a therapist for over 30 years, specializing in work with couples, families and relationships.
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